Author: Linda Meyer

Achieve your dreams at any age

Photo credit – L. Meyer

It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop

Confucius

I find myself collecting stories about elders in my community who break through barriers after many years in order to follow their dreams. Each of these stories reveals that perseverance and passionate persistence can culminate in some amazing achievements. And each story comes with unique hurdles that must be surmounted and overcome.

This past week, I have been following the story of Jackie Arnason who published her first children’s book later in her life. The launch of this published book took place this past Sunday on “Book Lover’s Day”. In an interview with local media, Jackie described how reading and writing stories helped her while growing up in the 30’s. A time of immense challenge for most people growing up in the Canadian prairies.

Like many of the writers that I know, Jackie spoke of her passion for story telling and the fact that she finally came to terms with her fears which kept her from following that dream for decades. Finally, with encouragement from a family member who had connections in the publishing industry, she was able to push forward and realize her desire to see one of her stories in print.

What makes this journey even more noteworthy is that it occurred at age 87, which many of us can’t even quite imagine living to see, let alone being the age in which you finally begin accomplishing your long held goals.

Now energized by this success and with a new direction for her creative pursuits, Jackie is hard at work on her second children’s book to be published in the near future. As I listened to an in depth interview about this fascinating late in life journey, I couldn’t help but wonder what might have been different about this woman’s story if fear hadn’t intervened and kept her from moving forward.

How often do we find ourselves stuck or stymied because we are afraid of taking a risk? Afraid of being judged or of failing or of not measuring up to what we believe others can do. Fear holds many of us hostage and as I have been learning, it is never too late to stand up to our fears and overcome them.

It is remarkable to see the tenacity of the creative spirit. By seeking these amazing artistic elders out, it gives me courage to formulate my own later in life goals. By following our dreams at any stage of life and finding the courage to shed the chains of fear, we can only move forward.

Be healthy and safe!

Making a difference, one decision at a time

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

One person can make a difference, and everyone should try

John F. Kennedy

Imagine if our world was led by leaders today who encouraged each of us to make a difference like strong leaders have done in the past. There has never been a more urgent need around the globe for strong leadership encouraging compassion, collaboration, and co-operation. We are surrounded by crisis and chaos and need to think of others during all of our day to day interactions.

Misinformation abounds and we need to carefully reflect on where our information originates from and consider the influence it has not only on ourselves but on others prior to sharing it.

When we put our personal needs and desires above the health and safety of others, it will eventually circle back to hurt us. Tragically, it may harm those you care about as well. Treat everyone in the same manner in which you would like to be treated. Globally, our lives depend upon a collective push forward to follow the golden rule.

Stay safe and healthy!

Finding that spark at any age

Photo by Alex Andrews on Pexels.com

If you find something you love it’s so exciting. Your brain is a bowl of energy. It gives you such passion for life. That is the power of creativity.

Thelma Pepper

One of the most fascinating women I have come across is a photographer who just yesterday celebrated her 100th birthday. Thelma Pepper didn’t begin her creative journey until she turned 60. It was at that point in her life, she embarked on a long career creating stunning black and white portraits of people from rural Saskatchewan. She elevated her subjects, celebrating hardworking people who had amazing stories that would have otherwise never have been told. Thelma also told compelling stories through her camera lens, about the lives of many individuals living in long term care homes.

Her message of finding something you love to do especially later in life is both impressive and inspiring. Creativity does stimulate energy and it can appear at any age or stage of life. I have noticed during this time of physical and social isolation that I was missing that creative spark. My attention span seemed to have vanished and finding that energizing passion for either photography or writing has been almost non-existent. At best, I have been able to revisit pieces of writing and photos taken and focus on an editing process instead of creating anew.

My writing practice seems stunted, some of the tricks that have worked in the past no longer inspire. I am putting in the time but don’t feel that I have that upbeat energy I get when my brain and heart work in tandem. All of those editing tasks that I had been putting off are now completed and submissions for publication have been for writing pieces written some time ago. I have been missing that form of energy that completely envelopes you, making it hard to leave what you are doing when you are required to attend to something else.

Tired of cleaning the house, I have been seeking that elusive creative energy from the stories of other artists which led me to Thelma’s story. Her award winning art is stunning and her message is one of hope that at any age, we can navigate life transitions and begin a creative career by following what leads us to touch that passion within ourselves. What serves as your source of creativity and inspiration? Hopefully you are finding your way through this pandemic, overcoming the difficulties that may have arisen and are moving forward in the direction you would like to be going in.

Stay safe and healthy!

Learning on the fly

Have you ever stopped to consider how many aspects of daily living you have had to adjust or relearn to do over the past four months? This thought occurred to me when I was looking at the course details for “up skilling” in order to deliver a workshop that I have been teaching for the past couple of years. Teaching on Zoom or some other platform for 6 hours a day seems impossible to me at this moment in time but my guess would be in a year or two, I will be doing it and not batting an eye.

Shopping for groceries, trying to socialize within a “bubble”, attending a wedding on Zoom and spending hours considering where to vacation close to home this summer – all of these are things that have become a part of our new normal. Much of what we do is now done differently and have become consolidated behaviours in our lives. Hopefully anyways.

All of these activities in the beginning seemed difficult and nerve wracking. Either my brain has adapted and I have become more risk tolerant or I simply have developed and established new routines and ways of doing things. This shows me that when given no alternative, we can indeed learn new things.

When I consider how often in the past, fear may have prevented me from trying something new or inhibited me from moving outside of my comfort zone, it is empowering to think that we can adapt, adjust, and learn new skills, and ways of being. This is my 50th blog post so not only have I hit my accountability goal for writing but I have actually followed through on something I didn’t really think I could do.

A year ago, a kind and supportive family member assisted me in signing on to WordPress after a decade or more of thinking about starting a blog but not sure how to go about it. This adventure has not been about having the perfect blog format, or getting lots of readers and likes but has been about overcoming the fear I had about sharing my writing.

What I have learned is that the process of writing a post each week has actually laid the foundation for a solid writing practice. I have found confidence to send out pieces of writing for consideration in a variety of publications. Happily I have even published two stories in literary magazines and have solid outlines now for larger writing projects.

When I began this writing journey, I was filled with doubts about the process and my ability to actually post every week. Filled with new learning opportunities, this process has led to the knowledge that I can still acquire new skills and my plans and goals are becoming more and more clear. Couple this with the impact of the pandemic on my life, I have discovered that learning on the fly is not only achievable but necessary and life affirming. At this stage of my life, I can’t ask for anything more.

Stay healthy and safe!

Farewell to a feline friend

Miss Lucky – Photo credit L Meyer

Transition and change have permeated our lives and just as I believed I was finding my footing with our “new normal” an unwelcome and unanticipated change landed at our doorstep. Our cat, a long time member of our family and certainly a senior feline became suddenly ill. No stranger to several maladies that impact senior cats, our “Miss Lucky” was prone to bouts of constipation occasionally requiring trips to the vet clinic, but this time was markedly different. She was diagnosed with lymphoma and we had to make the difficult decision to euthanize her.

One considers these sorts of possible outcomes but until you have to plant yourself face to face with this eventuality, it doesn’t have an emotional impact. When the time comes, no amount of preparation will prevent the grief from welling up when you least expect it. Strange how much of our hearts this feline companion captured. It is unsettling to expect to find her in her many favourite spots around the house and experience the jolt of realization that she is gone for good.

I found over the years that my feline friend was both a comfort and a source of solace when difficult times entered my life. She was a stalwart companion when my father passed away, my son left home, and finally, when I left full time work and struggled a bit to find my bearings and establish new routines. Animals naturally help humans in our healing process and it seems bittersweet and ironic now that my cuddle buddy is no longer available to help me heal from this particular loss and adapt to change.

A special pet becomes a member of your family, an integral aspect of one’s daily lives and routines. Our cat also filled in those tiny fissures that break out in your heart as you accumulate the pain from traumatic events and major disappointments and it seems that those emotions are close to the surface now as well. I guess that is the nature of the grieving process. It can’t be rushed and this transition will require new comforts and new forms of support. Patience will be required as I find my way forward.

I am truly grateful to have had our feline friend in my life for the past fifteen years.

Rest in peace, Miss Lucky

Everything changes

If you leave a white fence post alone it becomes a black fence post. So if you want it to stay white, you have to keep painting it white. You want something to stay the same, you’ve got to constantly change it.

Joseph Finder
Photo by Alexas Fotos on Pexels.com

The pace of change in our world at this time seems to be moving faster than the speed of sound. Whether the changes occurring are positive or negative actually seems to be besides the point. It is the impact of the swiftness of changes in our daily lives that seems to have a de-stabilizing force that we all must grabble with.

Whether it is the constantly changing information about the coronavirus at the heart of this pandemic, tectonic shifts in our geopolitical landscape, or simply how to negotiate a family barbecue in the backyard, we seem to be inundated with the need to reconsider many aspects of life. Trying to make good decisions and avoid either over estimating or under estimating risks to avoid contracting COVID-19 can be not just time consuming but confusing and anxiety provoking.

A part of me believed that because I had just transitioned from full time work to semi-retirement thereby causing seismic changes in my life, that I would be fine adjusting to all of the disruptions that seem to be predominating our current reality. Change often represents either a loss or an opportunity. Certainly when I retired, I experienced losses – loss of income, loss of identity; daily contact with colleagues, etc. But since then, it has proven to be an amazing time of opportunity.

My writing practice has evolved to where I had hoped it would be at this point in my “new” career. Pre-pandemic I had satisfying part time work in my profession that kept me in contact with my favourite parts of my “old” world. Courses, new activities, plenty of time for walking with a focus on my own health, and new friendships provided the icing on my cake. So why have the past few months seemed so challenging and fraught with overwhelming changes that are hard to understand and accept.

Journal keeping has been a sporadic practice all through my life but since the end of March I have kept daily notes of thoughts and feelings about the pandemic and so many other pivotal moments in our lives. This morning it felt important to pause and to re-read entries from the past few months. Clearly I was looking for perspective and understanding to ground me.

What stood out upon this reflection was the impact that the many current changes were having on my life and to those close to me. And of course, when I am longing for things to be “the way they used to be” I am inadvertently creating unnecessary stress in my life. It isn’t really a cliche to focus only on what we are able to control. Being able to recognize this is the first step to managing all of the decisions to be made and life changes that must be navigated.

Learning to accept change, and being able to nurture the ability to become more flexible is a critical life skill that helps us to adapt and thrive. It seemed clear to me this morning that this is important not just in these times of our changing landscape but at any point in our lives. Change is inevitable. Learning to cope with it effectively seems more critical now than ever before.

The one thing I believe I can count on is that…everything changes. And it is a comfort to know that with some effort, we can control our responses to that.

Stay healthy and safe!

Happy Canada Day!!

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Est. July 1st, 1867

Taking a break today to celebrate our nation’s birthday in a quiet, thoughtful kind of way. I intend to take a welcome break from thinking about the pandemic, economic meltdowns, systemic racism, political theatrics, hate speech that permeates social media, and the destruction of our environment.

Instead a day to reflect on the possibilities of how we can each do our part to evolve to preserve our environment while sharing our country with one another in equitable, respectful, and peaceful ways.

Stay healthy and safe!! Happy birthday Canada!!

Throwing plans out the window

“We must let go of the life we planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us” – Joseph Campbell

Recently, I have come to the realization that I have been hanging onto a fierce longing for everything in my life to return to “normal”. I am also working towards accepting that aspects of my life may be permanently altered. And, I am trying to be okay with that.

Going through a journal I found last year that dates back to my university days, I had typically started all of the entries I wrote with a quote and so happened upon some of the wisdom from Joseph Campbell. Managing expectations and building in flexibility to my skill set was something I thought that I had achieved quite awhile ago.

Apparently, these are skills that must be worked on in an ongoing fashion in order to be available when you actually need to draw upon them. As my emotional responses to the events that are shaping the world right now become more rigid and as I struggle to not apply inappropriate expectations on goals and plans I had for my life at this stage, I realize I need a refresher course.

Understanding the areas of my life that define my purpose and give shape to the meaning I attach to activities and people that I value had started to fade into the background. Taking time out for reflective thought rather than simply staying “busy” for the sake of just being busy has actually grounded me in ways that I had been losing touch with.

My journaling practice had fallen by the wayside and I was struggling with my writing practice as my headspace was full of “woulda, shoulda, coulda” types of thoughts. This crept up on me just like your shoulders begin to reach towards your earlobes when you are stressed.

Recognizing that I am in transition once again and that I need to accept where this is taking me to at this time is hard work. I have always had to apply focus to relax my expectations of myself. So I am doing everything in my power to let this self-knowledge be my guide during these challenging times.

What do you do to get through times when your plans are thrown off kilter, activities of daily living change, and your relationships become altered?

Stay healthy, safe and keep moving through this wild journey we call life!

Smile at a child today, please!

As I finished my walk this morning, the final leg required me to walk over a narrow covered foot bridge that spans across a local creek. The custom for physical distancing at this bridge has been a delicate dance requiring people on foot and on bikes or roller blades to wait for someone to get all the way across and then the next person would be able to go. At times, this has meant that you had to wait your turn and for the most part people on the walking path were patient and respectful. Especially in the early part of this pandemic.

But times have changed and human behaviour is shifting. More often than not these days, people seem to avoid eye contact and at times it appears they shrink into themselves not offering a hello or a smile.

This avoidant behaviour has become more prevalent as the pandemic progresses and at times, facial expressions on people crossing that bridge signal annoyance or agitation. As our community moves towards re-opening, it feels like we are participating in a three legged race. Some of us are still practicing physical distancing as we did when we first began to shelter in place and others seem to have shrugged off any concern about risk and appear visibly annoyed with those that do.

Today while out on my daily walk, I encountered a young family. A mother steering a large baby stroller and a small boy riding a tiny two wheeler could be seen at the other end of the bridge. I had arrived before them and had already begun walking so I was about half way across the bridge when the boy on his tiny bike starting riding. His mother told him to stop and he quickly moved back when she asked him to and his face clearly communicated that he was upset. As I grew closer to where they were, I could see that his upset face was more fearful than angry and I wondered about that.

When I came to the end of the bridge, I smiled at this boy and thanked him for waiting for me to get across. He looked up at me with a mixture of astonishment and amazement on his little face, clearly surprised. He said loudly to his mother, “that lady smiled at me mommy and she said thank you!”. This young mother briefly looked down at him and then up at me as I passed. Her silent thanks seemed odd to me at first, but then I started to consider what some aspects of this pandemic experience must be like viewed through the eyes of a child.

I know that I am sensitive to the non verbal facial expressions of those I encounter on my daily walks, so what must that be like for a child? As this period of social and physical distancing has progressed, those expressions have shifted. Shifting from smiles and waves and saying hello. To gazes cast downward, pointed looks of annoyance, and at times, obvious frustration. How must young children interpret this strange new world where at times blatant disrespect and lack of common courtesy can be seen in everyday interactions.

How frightening this all must be. So if you have a chance today, smile at a child. And for that matter, smile at others, whenever the opportunity presents itself.

Stay safe and healthy!

Shifting Truths

What will be required to create meaningful, equitable change in our lives? Certain truths have become evident to me during this pandemic that suggest collectively we have the need to pause, reflect, and consider what is truly needed to make sustained and real change so we can move forward in a good way. Having vacillated between watching the news too often and not watching it at all, I thought I had achieved some type of balance. This past week I have found that my focus has once again been on what has been going on in the world around me.

Thinking about some of the larger issues that we must confront, has caused me to wonder if we are simply spinning without direction only to end up with just more of the same problems we had pre-pandemic. Consider news events over the past week – the focus has shifted from how will we safely reopen and stave off a second wave of the virus that has wreaked havoc across the world to a long overdue and serious dialogue about systemic racism.

Hundreds of thousands of people from across the globe have been involved in lending their voices to the Black Lives Matter protests in spite of the possible risks of spreading the coronavirus. Stories of racism that are being shared right now are heartbreaking and have precipitated a plethora of ideas about how to effect real changes.

One of the ideas that has been circulating through many communities is that police should be defunded. Journalists around the world are sharing news about more protests, petitions, and equally as many stories from politicians and police officials stating that they believe this is the wrong approach.

This seems to be a repeating process that we have seen with other critical issues such as climate change, the best strategies to manage this global pandemic, and better ways to care for the elderly and marginalized members of our society, etc. etc. Just as quickly as these stories are told, and shared widely we hear all of the rationale as to why suggested changes can’t be made. Point and counter point. Or worse yet, nothing more is written or discussed as the news cycles bring other issues forward.

During this time of loosening our lockdown, it seems more plausible that we might have an opportunity to come together to make changes that have been discussed for decades. There has been more emphasis on our collective global needs than ever before in my lifetime. So I can’t help wonder if this will be the moment in our history when we will change course en masse. Focus, tenacity, and individual commitment to change will be required on a large scale.

Electing politicians who are not narcissistic, self absorbed, and can be held to account would be a wonderful place to start. One can be criticized I suppose for dreaming of a kinder, more generous way of treating one another as well as a bonafide coming together to save our environment. But I don’t think that would stop me from writing about the need to do better than we are now. How about you? What do you think we should do to make a real impact at this time in our lives?