Be bold…do everything you can to support others right now

I believe we begin every day anew with an empty cup. It’s up to us to fill it with beliefs, thoughts and action that inspire and honour the journey we all share.
Polly Simpkins, The Cup of Karma Project

Countries in various parts of the globe made hard choices a number of months ago to do everything in their power to stop the coronavirus in its tracks and for the most part they have been successful. These choices helped them achieve better outcomes from both a health and an economic perspective. Recently, several countries have done a remarkable job with vaccines leading the way for a path forward for all of us to emulate.

Some countries though are in a constant struggle with how to implement public health measures that will not be met with resistance, protest and outright animosity. The majority of people, albeit, tired of restrictions and isolation follow the rules in order to protect themselves, those they care about and others in their communities. But it has become an uphill battle with people becoming more entrenched in their positions on whether or not they believe vaccines are safe, whether or not masks save lives, and those who claim that Covid 19 is not real continuing to spin their fantastical tales.

Imagine a world where we all agree we are in the same boat together, pulling on oars together in synchronous fashion. Our ship would glide through these turbulent waters as we worked hard not only for ourselves but for one another. Instead at times, we seem to be spinning in opposite directions with some of us pushing, others pulling, with the result being that we are going around and around.

This is a global problem and we need to do more of the good and decent things that we do best and less and less of those that are harmful to ourselves and those around us. Until we decide to put all of our best efforts into ending this pandemic, it won’t end. It will retreat briefly, only to flare up again and again. It is up to each and everyone of us to lead by example and encourage and support others if they are struggling.

Letting go of misdirected anger, animosity, and harmful rhetoric would be a wonderful place to start. Putting faith in our collective efforts, respectfully agreeing to disagree, and thinking about what we could each do that would make an indelible impact upon our future. Working together to resolve the pandemic would give us the encouragement needed to take on the world’s climate crisis and the myriad of other critical issues that require our urgent attention.

Every individual can make a difference. Collectively, we just need to believe that we really want to.

Stay healthy and safe!

Learning to accept the roller coaster of emotions

Emotions are celebrated and repressed, analyzed and medicated, adored and ignored – but rarely, if ever, are they honoured
Karla McLaren

Being successful in the management of one’s feelings is an ongoing process. Few of us ever reach that vaulted and imaginary finish line, where we have mastered times of inner emotional turbulence. Most of us endure times where we might struggle in managing some of the more difficult emotions that humans experience. It is challenging during these ongoing stressful times to not periodically fall into a dark, dangerous pit of negativity or a false, shrill sense of pseudo optimism often referred to as “toxic positivity”.

Having become more isolated from face to face interpersonal interactions during the “third” wave, it can seem overwhelming to sort out the day to day emotional roller coaster ride that at times seems as if we are hanging on by the tips of our fingers. When we do see people important in our lives, it is all too easy to gloss over or avoid expressing our authentic but unpleasant emotions.

For a period of time, many people were describing the “silver linings” that they were finding during the pandemic. Some of these were profound but many so called silver linings could only be described as inane. But the reality for most of us seems to have become a suspension in time. Where we might be simply languishing. Waiting without an understanding of what might happen next. Finding the future path forward muddied and unclear, along with a plethora of feelings – both negative and positive ones. Some okay and some not so okay.

But they are just feelings. Fleeting moments of emotion that we can learn to manage. The urge we might have when confronted by negative feelings is to outrun them, subdue them, numb them, and this is something that many of us experience but struggle to acknowledge. Fear of pushing others away when we need them the most leads us at times, to downplay those moments when we are experiencing negative feelings.

Humans struggle to listen to one another at the best of times. During the worst of times, this becomes a critical skill to support those we love and care about. Creating opportunities for the expression of emotions regardless of what they are, is a kindness that we could all use more of. Easing the hardship of times where emotional expression is a struggle for someone may be an unexpected gift.

Finding our way forward to accept that emotions are fluid, both positive and negative, and that we all share them as a part of our human experience can only be a good thing. Having a world full of people who will listen to what you need too share, is an even better thing.

Stay healthy and safe!

Subtle signs of spring…and hope

As I sit down to write this post, I can see snowflakes fluttering down from the sky, once again. April has been a challenging month, cold bitter temperatures arrived along with large amounts of snow that didn’t melt for a number of days. Raging active case counts have accompanied the third wave of the coronavirus causing more restrictions, more isolation, and fear. Political theatrics play out around our world as covid deniers, flat earth proponents, and anti-climate change crusaders take up air time.

So seeking the hopeful emotions that accompany the changes brought by the spring season seems to have been more elusive this year. Robins arrived on time to a landscape covered in snow and ice. But they remained, unchanged and unharmed in spite of it. Nesting activities continued as per usual. The wild rabbits living in a nearby park changed colour even though their food sources were buried once more and nature’s backdrop was once again painted white. Perennials in my garden seem to have survived the frigid temperatures with no lasting ill effects. Proving they are hardy prairie plants. Which persevere.

An annual journey out to the valley to search out and photograph early spring crocus yielded results similar to years past. Waves of relief accompanied what was actually framed in my viewfinder as I prepared to click the shutter. Although the telltale indications of spring have been slow to come given the disruptions around us, the signs albeit subtle, now gently surround us. Stirring the soul. Providing fresh energy. Giving us hope. Where it is needed.

Stay healthy and safe!

On writing in Coffee shops and other public spaces…

If you can’t sit in a cafe quietly and be ignored, how can you observe human nature and write a story
Evangeline Lilly

Do you miss those random opportunities to overhear conversations in public spaces? To wonder about the people that you are able to observe. I definitely am looking forward to a future where we can once again gather with our family and friends. Where we are able to move about our daily activities without nervousness and fear.

And I really miss those snippets of life where we happen upon conversations between strangers and are able to absorb the body language and nuances of language that are observed and overheard. Oftentimes these translate into dialogue or story ideas. At times, the necessity to write words down would become urgent following these brief human interactions in day to day life.

Character sketches and those tiny seeds that are planted in our imagination somehow become triggered and released when we are in the company of others. Fragments of those worlds inhabited by other people often gain a foothold once we have momentum in our writing process. It is a sub-conscious process that is barely noticed until it is no longer possible.

Last month during a flash fiction workshop, our facilitator read from recently published works. They came into being from these slices of life that were a part of our pre-pandemic world. A brief interaction on public transit, an overheard discussion while waiting for a friend in a cafe, and spending time in public spaces alone but with others. In our current reality, at best my imagination plays a guessing game where I wonder about the facial expression underneath a mask.

Lattes and cappuccinos can be brewed at home but feeling a part of the world and telling the stories that were once all around us lies off in the distance. For now, I am relying on memory of those moments and will relish the time to come in our future when we are able to safely be around others in public spaces. For now I will write words about our human story as they come and take the time to imagine that I am once again alone in a coffee shop.

Stay healthy and safe!

Pandemic puppies and bicycle booms

In the face of adversity, we have a choice. We can be bitter, or we can be better. Those words are my North Star
Caryn Sullivan

As the world races to fend off the third wave of the pandemic, it is easy to become overwhelmed by negative news cycles and what seems to be never ending worry and fear. There are some aspects to our current experience that seem to have been positive.

As people in our neighbourhood moved from offices to working from home, it was both fascinating and worrisome to note the number of puppies on our walking paths and park areas. Worrisome in the sense that potentially many animals could end up surrendered to our local humane society when purchased without careful thought and consideration.

Over a year later, these dogs have grown and matured and seem to have become members of families and are now recognizable to me while I am out walking as well. And they all seem well trained and behaved, another side effect of spending all of our time at home instead of somewhere far away while household pets waited anxiously for their owners to return.

Along with new creatures in our community, there is also a noticeable swell in bicycles being ridden by people of all ages. Cars parked along our streets for months without being moved have been likely violating some city bylaw. But it’s wonderful to see people use bicycles or walk to where they need to go and not to rely so much on fossil fuelled sources of transportation. Daily noise of airplane traffic seems to have diminished and one wonders what our future world will bring. A return to old behaviours that have been accelerating climate change or a more mindful path forward?

Gardening, camping, spending more time in the outdoor world. There have been good adaptations along with those that are more challenging. We have learned to continue to connect with family and friends in spite of not being able to see them face to face. Some of us are reading, making things, creating art in any form, and cooking at home, more now than ever before.

While we are likely all hopeful for an end in sight, it is reassuring to know that it has not all been negative and that we have the ability to make changes. Big ones that potentially could chart new directions in our world. We do have the opportunity to become better than we were before.

Stay healthy and safe!

Notes from the Drive Through Vaccination Clinic

Vaccinations are being rolled out in our community according to criteria such as age, health care professionals, etc., and based on supply. A special opportunity arose in our city, which has had a concerning spike in variants in the past two weeks, for people in my age category to receive the first dose of a Covid – 19 vaccine at a drive through clinic. Not something that I have ever experienced before but I jumped at this as soon as I heard it being announced.

So I arrived early this morning just as the clinic was set to open and found myself driving towards long lines of cars. Typically this parking area, dull asphalt grey, is used for professional sporting events, exhibitions and a giant agricultural show. Now it has been transformed into a health care staging area! By the time I had parked, and scoped out my surroundings, I quickly realized two things. First, there were so many cars that I couldn’t actually understand how the queue was to work and second, as people parked both beside and behind me, I would not be leaving any time soon. So, with no chance to change my mind, I settled in for the journey.

A kind young woman came to my car and asked to place a card on my windshield so that they could use my arrival time to assess what the actual wait time was to receive a vaccination. Sure, I said, and what exactly is your best guess at the wait time. Five hours she said, then quickly pointed out the portable washroom facilities and wished me a great day! As I looked around me, I saw one of my new neighbours reading a book titled, The Power of Habit” and the woman in front of me opened her trunk revealing a cooler and a lawn chair.

Most people seemed to be using their cell phones and for the first hour, it was relatively quiet in our area of the gigantic parking lot. After about an hour, I was feeling stiff and somewhat uncomfortable so got out of my car to stretch and to determine how the lines would work. There didn’t seem to be any traffic moving towards the buildings that I assumed we would be driving into. I could also see that people were becoming a bit restless and some headed off to use the facilities. It occurred to me at this point that there might be long lines for those as well.

So I decided not to drink very much liquid and to wait as long as possible. I set off for a long walk and marvelled at the number of vehicles that kept coming and watched as new lines continued to form well beyond where I was. Walking back to my car, I began to gather a sense of how the traffic would flow once lines began to move. People were now mostly outside of their cars, the gentlemen beside me having abandoned his reading material and now had begun cleaning his headlights. Several people climbed into their truck beds to video the scene and to survey what was going on.

I spoke with a woman who commented that she was most grateful for this opportunity and I heartily agreed. Hard to be cranky about waiting when you were about to receive something that potentially could be life saving. The weather is fully cooperative, with soul warming sunshine and little wind. I try and read a bit and write some words but am finding myself too distracted by everything going on around me. Finally, the line beside me roars to life with cars starting and I realize we are soon to be next.

The journey continues. Albeit it is slow and meandering and I still can’t visualize where we will end up. Another hour of slow, steady driving towards a certain destination that must be within eyesight but the line of cars snakes around corners. Eventually, the building we will enter is suddenly before us and it is clear where the line finally ends. Once inside, cheerful, proficient professional nurses are administering vaccines and once completed, we are directed outside to a parked area manned by Emergency medical services personnel for the final 15 minute wait.

Five long hours seemed insignificant compared to the challenges of this entire past year. So glad, and so grateful to have had this opportunity. I will celebrate as our community continues to receive the chance to be safer and to stay healthy. Let’s hope that the next several months bring about the changes we have all been waiting for.

It doesn’t cost anything to be kind

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.
If you want to be happy, practice compassion
Dalai Llama

As we approach the one year anniversary since the pandemic began, the voices in our community have become louder and at times, difficult to listen to. We have all had to face our internal reactions to the impact that this virus has had on our lives. And as a general guideline, reactivity tends to come from a place of fear or a need to exert control over some aspect of our lives.

Across the globe, we are seeking hope and imagine positive outcomes with new vaccines. And at the same time we seem to be exposed to constant anger and frustration lurking at every turn about a myriad of issues. It seems that many places around the globe are coming to grips with the realization that public health guidelines will need to remain in place for some time to come. Loosening restrictions won’t occur overnight and will likely be scaled back at a snail’s pace.

We watch, we listen, and we interpret information that is constantly shifting and changing. It seems at times that the learning curve about this virus and what we need to do about it, continues to become steeper and steeper.

All the while, we need to recognize that every person has their own way of managing through this experience. If we find ourselves constantly judging the actions and behaviours of others, we are likely not paying that much attention to what we are doing. Whether we realize it or not, we are all in this together and healing comes from a place of reflection and compassion.

Many of us may be concerned about the financial, emotional, and social costs to this pandemic, but there is one critical option available to each of us. And there is no cost to it whatsoever.

And that is to internalize and practice kindness. Kindness, both in thought and actions towards others as well as to ourselves, is free and comes without strings attached. Instead, when we come to the people, events and circumstances in our lives from a place of kindness, it generates positive actions which allow us to move forward in good ways.

And wouldn’t it be much easier to navigate through this next year if there was more kindness circulating in our world. Be kind to yourself. And be kind to others.

Stay healthy and safe!

Searching to find words this winter

Winter knows to
hush,
still,
listen,
so the soul can
speak
Angie Weiland-Crosby

As the winter drags on, a polar vortex descends, blanketing most of the western Canadian prairies in temperatures so cold they are labelled as extreme and dangerous. Suddenly it seems that any motivation I have to write has disappeared. It’s simply vanished.

Winds outside my window howl, gusting relentlessly, siphoning moisture from the air. Skin cracks easily, becoming almost lizard like, now sucking up even the strongest of lotions. Constant reapplications makes it hard to hold a pen, my favoured writing instrument. Outside adventures are placed on hold, walking from room to room in my home now serves as the only form of daily exercise.

Why is it so difficult to create, I find myself wondering, to become inspired, to write when these horrid weather conditions descend upon us? Puzzled by this, I have been searching for answers, seeking motivation from outside of myself. Likely the wrong place to find the solution to this.

Gazing out the window of my office this morning, my treasured writing space, I notice that frost builds incredible patterns on windows that appear to dance during the sunrise. Backlit by the red glow of the sun, I am drawn to the shimmering vision before me.

Tiny intricate designs are there if one looks carefully, hiding beauty, revealing the apparent nature of creativity that surrounds me. A dawning realization emerges in my mind, and suddenly a different kind of energy begins to take shape within.

Finally, words begin to form in my mind’s eye, ideas begin to excite. I move to my desk and although somewhat stilted at first, like an ice jam that suddenly begins to thaw, the winter words seem to release and move onto the page. And just like that, I find that I can write again.

Stay healthy and safe!

Stories that matter…

Many stories matter. Stories have been used to dispossess and to malign. But stories can also be used to empower, and to humanize. Stories can break the dignity of a people. But stories can also repair that broken dignity.
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, author

Stories that move our hearts often stay with us for a long period of time. This week one of those kinds of stories emerged from a small community in our province about a young girl who had been shamed for wearing a traditional Indigenous ribbon skirt to a school event prior to the Christmas break. Her auntie had made this beautiful piece of clothing intended to symbolize her strength, womanhood, and her First Nations identity.

This young girl set off for school excited by the beauty of her skirt and pride in being able to wear this sacred piece of clothing. Shamed by a school employee for not wearing the right type of clothing, this child returned home defeated and confused. Her auntie used social media to share what had happened at school and to reach out to women to share the meaning and power of the ribbon skirt.

What transpired was really a movement where many Indigenous women posted and shared photographs of their own ribbon skirts from around the globe. These garments are works of art and the pride with which they are worn was evident in the photos that were shared. What mattered to me the most about this story was that the focus was not on the “shaming incident” at the school but the positive way in which so many women reached out to share their pride in their heritage and in the power of the ribbon skirt.

Listening to an interview with this girl, her enthusiasm and excitement from all of the posts her family received, it was hard not to smile and appreciate the positivity that was created. Pride in her First Nations ribbon skirt and sense of belonging with other girls and women from around the world became the message of the story.

When it was time to return to school this week, her family and members of her First Nation community organized a march back to the school all wearing their ribbon skirts or ribbon shirts. Accompanied by the performance of a drumming group and the attendance of chiefs from surrounding First Nations, this young girl returned to school with a renewed sense of pride in who she is and accompanied by the positive power of her community.

My thoughts have returned to this story many times since I heard it. Messages of positivity, forgiveness, and reconciliation were delivered with pride and a power that resonates.

Stories matter.

From Sourdough bread to six feet apart

I cannot do all the good that the world needs. But the world needs all the good that I can do.
Jane Stanfield

Photo by Monserrat Soldu00fa on Pexels.com

The end of a year is typically a time for some reflection on what is behind us and planning for celebrations as we usher in the new one. Since we can’t engage in typical New Year celebrations, many of us are spending more time than usual in reflection.

2020 seems to have been a year full of contradictions. A global pandemic that initially brought us together and then seemed to polarize and pull us apart. Countries demanding restrictions to keep everyone safe and then struggling as conflicts emerged when resistance and resentment set in. Neighbours rallying to cheer on health care workers at the end of shifts to large gatherings where protestors demonstrated against masks and science.

From sharing the best sourdough bread recipes to open defiance of public health guidelines. Where friends and family in isolation found comfort and connection in Zoom meeting rooms to phone hotlines set up so you could report anyone who violated the rules. While staying six feet apart, we learned to respect others around us in order to keep them safe to annoyance at anyone who seemed to think and behave differently than we did.

As vaccines are rolled out around the world, and lack of patience and exhaustion with our isolated world threatens to take hold, my wish for the new year is for more kindness. Kindness to everyone regardless of their point of view. Kindness to those in our lives who have managed their personal risk differently than we might have. Kindness which will be healing and help us transition into the world when this pandemic ends.

Farewell to the year 2020 – may the new year bring safety, good health, and above all, more kindness in each of our hearts.

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