Tag: positivity

Scarf bombing and other unique ways to help others

Photo by Flora Westbrook on Pexels.com

Good actions give strength to ourselves and inspire good actions in others

Plato

Frigid, cold weather conditions have settled in for the long haul this winter in the Canadian prairies. While many of us take for granted the warmth, safety, and security of our homes, there are many individuals in our communities who do not share this reality. Helping organizations like shelters, food banks, and outreach programs are challenged by funding constraints at the best of times, but have become sidelined by a myriad of competing societal concerns.

A recent article in our local newspaper included photographs of warm, homemade, wool scarves tied around the trees in on our downtown parks. This organic Canadian practice known as scarf bombing began in 2016 as a way to provide warm articles of winter clothing to people living in shelters or couch surfing. Intended to surface the serious challenges of being homeless in a harsh cold climate, these scarf bombing events signal the need for all of us to rally and find ways to provide support to others who need it.

Food security issues, safe harm reduction programs, and homelessness have never garnered wholesale community support. But during these difficult times, it seems as though our ability to care for the most marginalized members of society has taken a backseat to caring for ourselves and our immediate families. As we debate the value of lockdowns vs. keeping parts of the economy open, and whether or not we should follow the directions of public health officials, there is even less empathy within our society for those who have long been existing on the fringes.

Our best way forward through difficult times is finding ways to be intentional and creative in how we care for those in greater need than we are. Whether its picking up a pair of knitting needles, placing canned goods in little boxes on the street corner, or calling a non-profit to find out what they need, it’s worthwhile to find out how you might be able to help. Any act of volunteerism has the potential to make a real difference in someone else’s life as well has having the amazing side effect of helping us to feel better.

We don’t have to look very far to see need, it is swirling all around us. If we can gain momentum in caring for ourselves as well as others, perhaps collectively we can replace the negative rhetoric that is taking space in our lives with something much more meaningful and positive. So whether or not we choose to scarf bomb, donate canned goods, or write kind messages for seniors isolated in a care home, it’s possible to help ourselves become stronger by helping others.

Stay healthy and safe!

Leave those ghosts behind

Photo credit LMeyer

The great courageous act that we must all do, is to have the courage to step out of our history and past so we can live our dreams.

Oprah Winfrey

One of the challenges of these times is to remain balanced and to focus on the positives in our present and to spend some time planning for our future. It is all to easy to long for days gone by and to succumb to rumination about all that we may be missing out on in our lives because of the pandemic.

As the weather has become colder and the virus spread intensifies, it may seem even harder to focus on our goals, future hopes and dreams.

Seeking opportunities to develop skills that we ordinarily would never take the time to learn may take us down a path that has the potential to land us in a more positive place down the road.

Becoming more mindful of our health of both ourselves and those around us may have unexpected benefits in the future.

Learning unique ways to stay connected with one another may teach us to become more intentional with our connections and relationships.

Using technology to learn new skills may force us to move in directions that open up a realm of new opportunities and possibilities.

Taking time to develop a practice, routine, or set of activities that make us feel better about our selves and others is something we can carry forward and build into our future day to day lives.

Our world has been consumed with busyness and missed moments because there isn’t ever enough time to focus on goals or our aspirational dreams. Instead of living in regret for what we are missing right now, we could take these moments to reframe all of what is happening in our present reality as gifts which may enhance new learning. It’s time to release those ghosts in our past that have served as barriers and to embrace what may now be possible for our future.

Stay healthy and safe!

You don’t give up

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Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up

Anne Lamott

This felt like a morning where getting out of bed might be the last thing I wanted to do. Daybreak meant another day of thinking about the disheartening results of our recent provincial election, the pandemic, and my steep learning curve to learn how to deliver a mental health course on Zoom.

Learning that the newly elected governing party doesn’t want to separate from our country but will fight for “autonomy” provides little comfort. It likely just means more divisiveness, a giant step backwards in the fight against climate change, little hope for reconciliation and mean spirited rhetoric about the economy. Seems to be not only more of the same but emulates what is happening politically all over the globe.

Our prime minister stated yesterday that this pandemic “sucks”. That certainly is a statement that resonates. But the reality is we all need to continue to do our part and an end to this will certainly come but not soon. So once again, I need to allow myself, small measured doses of reading or listening to the news. Otherwise it simply overwhelms.

So I will get serious and focus on learning how to use technology to connect with others and provide some support and resources for positive mental health. Likely the adage practice makes perfect applies here. I am indeed aware that learning new things requires patience and applied effort, regardless of how hopeless it may initially seem.

Thankfully, my writing practice continues to soothe my weary soul. Consider that I am studying the writing craft from the perspective of Anne Lamott and this morning happened upon the above quote. I definitely needed her message of hope. And I won’t give up.

Stay healthy and safe!

Sifting through a kaleidoscope of emotion

Photo by L. Meyer

The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into shadows.

Brene Brown

It seems challenging to say the least, to stay grounded and positive with so much anxiety and uncertainty looming in our lives these days. It seems that many of us are experiencing an ongoing kaleidoscope of mixed emotions.

We may be watching to understand how the return to school for students around the globe will turn out.

Waiting for information about the timing of a safe vaccine.

Worrying about political pandemonium close to home.

Wondering about the possibility and probability of a second wave.

Feeling frustrated that the positivity of earlier months in the pandemic seems to have vanished.

Being courageous during trying times requires conscious and mindful attention to all that is good in our lives. Finding the self-knowledge within to understand that life is about seeking balance. Being grateful for what we have. Recognizing that shifting between the positive and negative allows us to see the value of both.

Reaching out to our people as often as we can. Our connections with one another remain the most important aspects of our lives. Respecting that will enable us all to safely get through these trying times. May you find both joy and light during these difficult times.

Stay healthy and safe!

Random acts of “whimsy”

Photo credit – L Meyer

You must not ever stop being whimsical. And you must not, ever, give anyone else the responsibility for your life

Mary Oliver

Have you ever stopped to reflect on how many aspects of our lives are governed by work, productivity, money, politics, etc. As opposed to spontaneity, creativity, and playfulness. We often believe that we lose our ability to play as we develop into adulthood. But it doesn’t need to end there. There are many ways that adults can play, be creative, and share this wonderful trait with others.

I have walked by this collection of magical bird houses in my neighbourhood for a number of months without recognizing just how precious and rare this whimsical creation really is. Our ability to engage in playful, fanciful pursuits is often curbed by being too busy, too stressed, or taking ourselves and our lives too seriously.

Indeed, as we move forward in our lives, we also seem to lose our natural abilities to live in the moment. This causes many of us to ignore the simple joys that exist in our daily surroundings. And right now this all seems to be complicated by the many potentially destructive and harmful forces in our lives that are currently impacting so many people around the globe.

How do we find our way back to those moments in our lives where we can play, where we can simply be and briefly take time to step back to enjoy a chance to see life through a more playful lens. Seeking out the whimsical in our lives can be inspirational and bring meaning into our daily routines. By looking around our neighbourhoods and communities, we may be pleasantly surprised by the creations of others designed to bring small pleasures into the world for all of us to enjoy.

The more I walk mindfully each day in the area where I live, the more amazed I have become by the creative actions of others. Whether it is an art installation, guerrilla gardening on unused patches of land, or a whimsical birdhouse collection in a back alley. These playful creations underscore our positive and real connections to each other.

Now more than ever, we need to either seek out random acts of whimsy in our part of this world or to create them ourselves and share with others. We can’t underestimate the healing power of play and creativity!

Stay healthy and safe!

Achieve your dreams at any age

Photo credit – L. Meyer

It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop

Confucius

I find myself collecting stories about elders in my community who break through barriers after many years in order to follow their dreams. Each of these stories reveals that perseverance and passionate persistence can culminate in some amazing achievements. And each story comes with unique hurdles that must be surmounted and overcome.

This past week, I have been following the story of Jackie Arnason who published her first children’s book later in her life. The launch of this published book took place this past Sunday on “Book Lover’s Day”. In an interview with local media, Jackie described how reading and writing stories helped her while growing up in the 30’s. A time of immense challenge for most people growing up in the Canadian prairies.

Like many of the writers that I know, Jackie spoke of her passion for story telling and the fact that she finally came to terms with her fears which kept her from following that dream for decades. Finally, with encouragement from a family member who had connections in the publishing industry, she was able to push forward and realize her desire to see one of her stories in print.

What makes this journey even more noteworthy is that it occurred at age 87, which many of us can’t even quite imagine living to see, let alone being the age in which you finally begin accomplishing your long held goals.

Now energized by this success and with a new direction for her creative pursuits, Jackie is hard at work on her second children’s book to be published in the near future. As I listened to an in depth interview about this fascinating late in life journey, I couldn’t help but wonder what might have been different about this woman’s story if fear hadn’t intervened and kept her from moving forward.

How often do we find ourselves stuck or stymied because we are afraid of taking a risk? Afraid of being judged or of failing or of not measuring up to what we believe others can do. Fear holds many of us hostage and as I have been learning, it is never too late to stand up to our fears and overcome them.

It is remarkable to see the tenacity of the creative spirit. By seeking these amazing artistic elders out, it gives me courage to formulate my own later in life goals. By following our dreams at any stage of life and finding the courage to shed the chains of fear, we can only move forward.

Be healthy and safe!

Learning on the fly

Have you ever stopped to consider how many aspects of daily living you have had to adjust or relearn to do over the past four months? This thought occurred to me when I was looking at the course details for “up skilling” in order to deliver a workshop that I have been teaching for the past couple of years. Teaching on Zoom or some other platform for 6 hours a day seems impossible to me at this moment in time but my guess would be in a year or two, I will be doing it and not batting an eye.

Shopping for groceries, trying to socialize within a “bubble”, attending a wedding on Zoom and spending hours considering where to vacation close to home this summer – all of these are things that have become a part of our new normal. Much of what we do is now done differently and have become consolidated behaviours in our lives. Hopefully anyways.

All of these activities in the beginning seemed difficult and nerve wracking. Either my brain has adapted and I have become more risk tolerant or I simply have developed and established new routines and ways of doing things. This shows me that when given no alternative, we can indeed learn new things.

When I consider how often in the past, fear may have prevented me from trying something new or inhibited me from moving outside of my comfort zone, it is empowering to think that we can adapt, adjust, and learn new skills, and ways of being. This is my 50th blog post so not only have I hit my accountability goal for writing but I have actually followed through on something I didn’t really think I could do.

A year ago, a kind and supportive family member assisted me in signing on to WordPress after a decade or more of thinking about starting a blog but not sure how to go about it. This adventure has not been about having the perfect blog format, or getting lots of readers and likes but has been about overcoming the fear I had about sharing my writing.

What I have learned is that the process of writing a post each week has actually laid the foundation for a solid writing practice. I have found confidence to send out pieces of writing for consideration in a variety of publications. Happily I have even published two stories in literary magazines and have solid outlines now for larger writing projects.

When I began this writing journey, I was filled with doubts about the process and my ability to actually post every week. Filled with new learning opportunities, this process has led to the knowledge that I can still acquire new skills and my plans and goals are becoming more and more clear. Couple this with the impact of the pandemic on my life, I have discovered that learning on the fly is not only achievable but necessary and life affirming. At this stage of my life, I can’t ask for anything more.

Stay healthy and safe!

Everything changes

If you leave a white fence post alone it becomes a black fence post. So if you want it to stay white, you have to keep painting it white. You want something to stay the same, you’ve got to constantly change it.

Joseph Finder
Photo by Alexas Fotos on Pexels.com

The pace of change in our world at this time seems to be moving faster than the speed of sound. Whether the changes occurring are positive or negative actually seems to be besides the point. It is the impact of the swiftness of changes in our daily lives that seems to have a de-stabilizing force that we all must grabble with.

Whether it is the constantly changing information about the coronavirus at the heart of this pandemic, tectonic shifts in our geopolitical landscape, or simply how to negotiate a family barbecue in the backyard, we seem to be inundated with the need to reconsider many aspects of life. Trying to make good decisions and avoid either over estimating or under estimating risks to avoid contracting COVID-19 can be not just time consuming but confusing and anxiety provoking.

A part of me believed that because I had just transitioned from full time work to semi-retirement thereby causing seismic changes in my life, that I would be fine adjusting to all of the disruptions that seem to be predominating our current reality. Change often represents either a loss or an opportunity. Certainly when I retired, I experienced losses – loss of income, loss of identity; daily contact with colleagues, etc. But since then, it has proven to be an amazing time of opportunity.

My writing practice has evolved to where I had hoped it would be at this point in my “new” career. Pre-pandemic I had satisfying part time work in my profession that kept me in contact with my favourite parts of my “old” world. Courses, new activities, plenty of time for walking with a focus on my own health, and new friendships provided the icing on my cake. So why have the past few months seemed so challenging and fraught with overwhelming changes that are hard to understand and accept.

Journal keeping has been a sporadic practice all through my life but since the end of March I have kept daily notes of thoughts and feelings about the pandemic and so many other pivotal moments in our lives. This morning it felt important to pause and to re-read entries from the past few months. Clearly I was looking for perspective and understanding to ground me.

What stood out upon this reflection was the impact that the many current changes were having on my life and to those close to me. And of course, when I am longing for things to be “the way they used to be” I am inadvertently creating unnecessary stress in my life. It isn’t really a cliche to focus only on what we are able to control. Being able to recognize this is the first step to managing all of the decisions to be made and life changes that must be navigated.

Learning to accept change, and being able to nurture the ability to become more flexible is a critical life skill that helps us to adapt and thrive. It seemed clear to me this morning that this is important not just in these times of our changing landscape but at any point in our lives. Change is inevitable. Learning to cope with it effectively seems more critical now than ever before.

The one thing I believe I can count on is that…everything changes. And it is a comfort to know that with some effort, we can control our responses to that.

Stay healthy and safe!

Happy Canada Day!!

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Est. July 1st, 1867

Taking a break today to celebrate our nation’s birthday in a quiet, thoughtful kind of way. I intend to take a welcome break from thinking about the pandemic, economic meltdowns, systemic racism, political theatrics, hate speech that permeates social media, and the destruction of our environment.

Instead a day to reflect on the possibilities of how we can each do our part to evolve to preserve our environment while sharing our country with one another in equitable, respectful, and peaceful ways.

Stay healthy and safe!! Happy birthday Canada!!

Smile at a child today, please!

As I finished my walk this morning, the final leg required me to walk over a narrow covered foot bridge that spans across a local creek. The custom for physical distancing at this bridge has been a delicate dance requiring people on foot and on bikes or roller blades to wait for someone to get all the way across and then the next person would be able to go. At times, this has meant that you had to wait your turn and for the most part people on the walking path were patient and respectful. Especially in the early part of this pandemic.

But times have changed and human behaviour is shifting. More often than not these days, people seem to avoid eye contact and at times it appears they shrink into themselves not offering a hello or a smile.

This avoidant behaviour has become more prevalent as the pandemic progresses and at times, facial expressions on people crossing that bridge signal annoyance or agitation. As our community moves towards re-opening, it feels like we are participating in a three legged race. Some of us are still practicing physical distancing as we did when we first began to shelter in place and others seem to have shrugged off any concern about risk and appear visibly annoyed with those that do.

Today while out on my daily walk, I encountered a young family. A mother steering a large baby stroller and a small boy riding a tiny two wheeler could be seen at the other end of the bridge. I had arrived before them and had already begun walking so I was about half way across the bridge when the boy on his tiny bike starting riding. His mother told him to stop and he quickly moved back when she asked him to and his face clearly communicated that he was upset. As I grew closer to where they were, I could see that his upset face was more fearful than angry and I wondered about that.

When I came to the end of the bridge, I smiled at this boy and thanked him for waiting for me to get across. He looked up at me with a mixture of astonishment and amazement on his little face, clearly surprised. He said loudly to his mother, “that lady smiled at me mommy and she said thank you!”. This young mother briefly looked down at him and then up at me as I passed. Her silent thanks seemed odd to me at first, but then I started to consider what some aspects of this pandemic experience must be like viewed through the eyes of a child.

I know that I am sensitive to the non verbal facial expressions of those I encounter on my daily walks, so what must that be like for a child? As this period of social and physical distancing has progressed, those expressions have shifted. Shifting from smiles and waves and saying hello. To gazes cast downward, pointed looks of annoyance, and at times, obvious frustration. How must young children interpret this strange new world where at times blatant disrespect and lack of common courtesy can be seen in everyday interactions.

How frightening this all must be. So if you have a chance today, smile at a child. And for that matter, smile at others, whenever the opportunity presents itself.

Stay safe and healthy!