Author: Linda Meyer

You don’t give up

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Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up

Anne Lamott

This felt like a morning where getting out of bed might be the last thing I wanted to do. Daybreak meant another day of thinking about the disheartening results of our recent provincial election, the pandemic, and my steep learning curve to learn how to deliver a mental health course on Zoom.

Learning that the newly elected governing party doesn’t want to separate from our country but will fight for “autonomy” provides little comfort. It likely just means more divisiveness, a giant step backwards in the fight against climate change, little hope for reconciliation and mean spirited rhetoric about the economy. Seems to be not only more of the same but emulates what is happening politically all over the globe.

Our prime minister stated yesterday that this pandemic “sucks”. That certainly is a statement that resonates. But the reality is we all need to continue to do our part and an end to this will certainly come but not soon. So once again, I need to allow myself, small measured doses of reading or listening to the news. Otherwise it simply overwhelms.

So I will get serious and focus on learning how to use technology to connect with others and provide some support and resources for positive mental health. Likely the adage practice makes perfect applies here. I am indeed aware that learning new things requires patience and applied effort, regardless of how hopeless it may initially seem.

Thankfully, my writing practice continues to soothe my weary soul. Consider that I am studying the writing craft from the perspective of Anne Lamott and this morning happened upon the above quote. I definitely needed her message of hope. And I won’t give up.

Stay healthy and safe!

Sometimes things seem topsy turvy…

Photo credit LMeyer

You can often change your circumstances by changing your attitude

Eleanor Roosevelt

So many aspects of our daily lives have been turned upside down during this pandemic. How easy it would be to give up hope or cave in to negativity as mounting challenges begin to resurface as the coronavirus gains momentum in communities around our country.

But we do have choice in how we wish to interpret the circumstances we find ourselves in as well as how we perceive the measures that we need to take to keep both ourselves and others safe. An unpleasant encounter last week with an anti-masker brought this home to me in a way that was both surprising and disturbing.

Leaving my local grocery store, I was accosted by a gentleman who began taunting me for wearing a mask. Moving too close into my personal space while making rude derisive comments, brought a realistic look at how this pandemic has the potential to both divide people and to unite them. After some reflection following this incident, it seems obvious that without consistent leadership from both public health officials as well as politicians, this fractious situation is likely to continue.

One can only imagine what might have happened if at the beginning of this pandemic every global leader had made the choice to implement universal strategies to prevent the virus from spreading around the world. At the same time! One can imagine that we may have had to endure only a few weeks in isolation and the virus may not have been able to gain such a strong foothold and could have burned itself out.

Perhaps that is just fanciful and wishful thinking. But we do have the ability to choose to care and respect everyone around us by following known measures to contain and control the virus. Our public health leaders are suggesting that at this time, we still have the ability to mobilize and contribute to a reduction in the spread of COVID-19.

If only we are able to merge our collective attitudes about our circumstances and collaborate with each other to achieve good health. Following several simple guidelines, which includes wearing a mask to protect others, does seem to assist society in achieving the desired outcomes.

We can turn our lives upside down again or we can share responsibility to cooperate and work to keep all in our communities healthy and safe. Seems like it should be a simple decision, doesn’t it.

Letting go…

Photo credit LMeyer

Life is a balance between holding on and letting go

Rumi

We have just celebrated Thanksgiving in Canada and although this is a time to be reflective, grateful, and thankful for all that we have, it was hard not to think about the changes and shifts in this year’s holiday tradition.

Family members celebrating quietly apart; meals scaled down; and our communication with one another relegated to Zoom; text messages, and phone calls. Looming anxiety over rising case numbers and the continued politicization of the pandemic. All of this a backdrop to the political shenanigans from the American president determined to put his needs ahead of the rest of the globe.

This provided a strange context in which to reflect on the things we normally appreciate – time with family and friends for good food and connection; a successful fall harvest; and all of the other aspects of our daily lives that we may typically take for granted. This one last opportunity to enjoy the outdoors on the prairies before we don toques, gloves, and warm parkas to brave frigid winter temperatures was overshadowed by our new global reality.

It is a stark reminder that all of the events and activities that we cherish in our lives can be altered, cancelled, or removed at any time. Holding on too tightly to things we may need to let go of is a necessary part of all of our lives. Some life lessons are easier than others.

Stay healthy and safe!

Climbing the empathy ladder

An empathy wall is an obstacle to a deep understanding of another person, one that can make us feel indifferent or even hostile to those who hold different beliefs or whose childhood is rooted in different circumstances.

Arlie Hochschild
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In 2016, American sociologist, Arlie Hochschild wrote a book titled, “Strangers in their own land”. Many read with interest this exploration and examination of the United States and the rise to power of President Trump. One concept that she outlined has stuck with me over the past four years. In order to understand others who have different values, beliefs and attitudes than us, we may need to climb over an empathy wall in order to develop connections with them.

During these anxiety provoking times, the American presidential debate might have provided a beacon of light and hope for the future. But sadly, it did not. It was simply a spectacle the likes of which most analysts suggest they had never seen before. I have always watched them to develop a deeper understanding of our neighbours to the south.

Although the news feeds seem to be rife with scenes of protest, divisiveness, and violence in America, there are many pressing concerns to be addressed not the least of which is the global pandemic. Perhaps my expectations for this televised debate were too high, but I watched anticipating a signal that things would be moving in a more positive direction.

There wasn’t one.

One wonders how difficult it will be during the next few months for people to climb “an empathy wall” in order to develop connections to work with one another.

Hopefully, the inherent goodness in humanity will prevail and people will be able to climb over this chasm of division so globally we can begin to move forward. Perhaps a sense of hope is the ladder we need to get to where we need to be.

Stay healthy and safe!

Listen carefully

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I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.

Ernest Hemingway

Reading news feeds over the past couple of days reveals that on a global level we are not using our ability to listen to one another. There is a constant cacophony of voices aggressively demanding to be heard. Political rhetoric is ramping up, the anxiety of re-opening and returning to school and work is significantly heightened, and people everywhere seem to be shouting at each other.

Listening is a skill that we have to work at and today it seems to be at risk of becoming lost as we collectively demand that others meet our needs. Stepping back, it seems nonsensical that politicians have to resort to shaming us into following public health orders in an effort to keep us safe. Public health doctors who are working tirelessly on our communal behalf, are now having to hire security as their lives are being threatened.

I wonder what it will take for us to learn to listen to one another. It seems that there is no time but the present for humans to work at this particular life skill.

Take the time today to notice the simple task of listening. Are the people in your world hearing your voice? Are you reciprocating and hearing the voices of others before reacting and responding to them? We are constantly and consistently being told to follow some basic strategies to move through this pandemic in the safest possible way.

Our future outcomes seem to depend on a simple yet difficult to achieve skill – listening to one another. Imagine what could happen if all of the people around us would actually take the time to truly listen to what is being shared about the need for everyone of us to follow some basic guidelines.

It is going to take a collective global effort of working together to move through this pandemic. That likely means setting aside some of our needs in order to keep others in our communities safe.

And it will start with all of us taking the time to listen to others around us about how to achieve this.

Stay healthy and safe!

Shifting adversity to opportunity

Photo credit L Meyer

Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems most challenging

Joseph Campbell

Typically at this time of the year children return to school and many people are back in the full swing of work following summer vacation and are getting set to resume a myriad of activities. This year there is nothing really “typical” about any of this. Many people around the globe have been challenged by uncertainty caused by the pandemic and our anxiety seems to be hovering at peak levels these days.

Reframing some of the current challenges in our lives as circumstances in which we can develop and strengthen resilience may be helpful. Drawing on the concept of transformational coping, we can learn to perceive stressful events less as threats and more as opportunities for personal growth and development.

Many of our daily routines and plans, both short term and long term, have been disrupted. But there is really choice in how we go about choosing to respond to these chaotic times. If we dig deep to understand how we are adapting and becoming creative, there is a mother lode of lessons that may be helpful for our future selves.

Taking time to focus on what could be rather than what we had hoped would be happening in our lives can help us to remain positive. It is all too easy to dwell on the negative events in our lives and keep ourselves in a place of feeling stuck and overwhelmed. Nothing in our lives has ever been “certain” and clinging to that illusory notion can take us to dark places.

What learning must occur in our lives in order to become more comfortable with constant changes – to foster skills to help us become more resilient? And how does this learning create empathy for those around us who are struggling with the same circumstances? These times are ripe for personal growth that might be missed if we choose not to look for it. Knowing that we still have choice about how we wish to grow during this moment in time seems like it might be key to helping us pivot to where we need to go.

Stay healthy and safe!

Sifting through a kaleidoscope of emotion

Photo by L. Meyer

The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into shadows.

Brene Brown

It seems challenging to say the least, to stay grounded and positive with so much anxiety and uncertainty looming in our lives these days. It seems that many of us are experiencing an ongoing kaleidoscope of mixed emotions.

We may be watching to understand how the return to school for students around the globe will turn out.

Waiting for information about the timing of a safe vaccine.

Worrying about political pandemonium close to home.

Wondering about the possibility and probability of a second wave.

Feeling frustrated that the positivity of earlier months in the pandemic seems to have vanished.

Being courageous during trying times requires conscious and mindful attention to all that is good in our lives. Finding the self-knowledge within to understand that life is about seeking balance. Being grateful for what we have. Recognizing that shifting between the positive and negative allows us to see the value of both.

Reaching out to our people as often as we can. Our connections with one another remain the most important aspects of our lives. Respecting that will enable us all to safely get through these trying times. May you find both joy and light during these difficult times.

Stay healthy and safe!

Catching our breath

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Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes…including you

Anne Lamott

Have you noticed an uptick with your neighbours, or friends, family members talking more about their theories of what might transpire when the kids return to school. Do your conversations now include discussions about the number of active cases of COVID-19 infections as handily as we used to discuss the weather? How often do you find yourself checking online after local health officials release the number of new and recovered cases in your community?

Our news feeds seem full of angry vitriol about what we should or should not be doing to move forward during this pandemic. Whether we should wear a mask or not. Or whether we should provide an economic hand up to those in need. This seems to be set against a backdrop of ongoing images of violence from the United States along with the ramping up of political rhetoric that is moving towards a tsunami of hatred.

At times it seems we have been caught in some strange gravitational pull into a vortex of negative news.

How do we step back from it all and regain our equilibrium?

It seems that we all need to take a collective step back, pause, and regain some balance. Return to a world that has people showing compassion for one another regardless of our identity. A world that once again cares about the environment, and no longer politicizes a public health threat. Finding our footing these days requires a tremendous amount of intentional emotional and psychological energy.

The most sensible strategy seems to be to simply put a pause on all of the outside noise and go analog for a few days. I have found that consciously seeking out opportunities to engage in acts of kindness, generosity, and show empathy for those around me also helps to reset. Writing, and other creative pursuits not only take up these spaces where negativity seems to have infiltrated my life but serve to remind me about the things that work to help me regain balance.

What will you do to reset during these difficult times?

Stay healthy and safe!

Random acts of “whimsy”

Photo credit – L Meyer

You must not ever stop being whimsical. And you must not, ever, give anyone else the responsibility for your life

Mary Oliver

Have you ever stopped to reflect on how many aspects of our lives are governed by work, productivity, money, politics, etc. As opposed to spontaneity, creativity, and playfulness. We often believe that we lose our ability to play as we develop into adulthood. But it doesn’t need to end there. There are many ways that adults can play, be creative, and share this wonderful trait with others.

I have walked by this collection of magical bird houses in my neighbourhood for a number of months without recognizing just how precious and rare this whimsical creation really is. Our ability to engage in playful, fanciful pursuits is often curbed by being too busy, too stressed, or taking ourselves and our lives too seriously.

Indeed, as we move forward in our lives, we also seem to lose our natural abilities to live in the moment. This causes many of us to ignore the simple joys that exist in our daily surroundings. And right now this all seems to be complicated by the many potentially destructive and harmful forces in our lives that are currently impacting so many people around the globe.

How do we find our way back to those moments in our lives where we can play, where we can simply be and briefly take time to step back to enjoy a chance to see life through a more playful lens. Seeking out the whimsical in our lives can be inspirational and bring meaning into our daily routines. By looking around our neighbourhoods and communities, we may be pleasantly surprised by the creations of others designed to bring small pleasures into the world for all of us to enjoy.

The more I walk mindfully each day in the area where I live, the more amazed I have become by the creative actions of others. Whether it is an art installation, guerrilla gardening on unused patches of land, or a whimsical birdhouse collection in a back alley. These playful creations underscore our positive and real connections to each other.

Now more than ever, we need to either seek out random acts of whimsy in our part of this world or to create them ourselves and share with others. We can’t underestimate the healing power of play and creativity!

Stay healthy and safe!